In conversations with other Ripenists, a recurring question often asked is this:
“How do I stop myself from being overwhelmed?”
There are some excellent techniques, both mental and physical, which having applied them myself, I can attest to. Let me offer some of these to you, should the thought of your own ripening become a tad overwhelming …
Focus on being totally, absolutely, utterly present in this moment. Meditation, in whatever form works for you, can help. ‘Sitting Practice’ works well for me.
Lather, rinse and repeat. And repeat. And repeat. And repeat again…
Please note that this is not to say that you should ignore the future. I trust that as a smart, self-aware woman, you are also a moderately responsible person which means you have a current Will and review it annually, as well as a retirement plan (which may or may not provide all your financial needs – the ‘how long will I live?’ question being the tricky point) and most importantly, you have medical insurance!
Remind yourself that you are taking care of the practical stuff you can foresee (note the afore mentioned responsible actions) and pat yourself on the back for that.
The rest of the come-what-may that is out of your control is not worth wasting your time, energy or brain cells worrying about. What’s that often quoted number?
Something like 87% of what we worry about doesn’t actually happen anyway.
So stay in this moment.
And in this moment, deliberately change your state to one of mindfulness – physically, mentally and emotionally – and go find yourself some joy.
In case this concept baffles you, here’s a taste of what I do:
I listen to the birds. I cuddle my sooky dog Spike, the Spoodle. I give my man a hold-on-tight hug. I dig in the garden. I call my Mum. I bake. I celebrate my body by having a massage, facial or pedicure. I read something inspiring or escapist. I stretch sloooowly. I do meaningful work. I daydream about gorgeous interior design. I throw myself around in various moves that only resemble dancing if you can actually hear the music. I drink excellent coffee with a friend. I plan a trip to see my sister. I walk around our local Botannical Gardens. I hang out with younger people and soak up their possibility thinking. I marvel at the ripening of our passionfruit. And I eat one. Or two…
What makes it on to your joy-producing list?
Finally, if all else fails, try applying the Perspective technique of asking yourself this:
‘If I stay in this state of Overwhelm, how will I feel in 5 hours, 5 days, 5 weeks?’
Any number works (e.g. 10 days, 10 weeks, 10 months). Just consider a relevant passage of time and the impact of staying as you currently feel, on yourself and your Beloveds. That’s always enough to make me think of the Overwhelm in the ‘this too shall pass’ vein. Having perspective truly is one of the gifts of having lived your first half of life!
So apply it to your second half and go make it deliberately delicious.
What do you do when you are over overwhelm?
Share your wisdom with The Ripenist community here.